Nurse the Hate: Hate Hilton Rockville

11.19.18

Christopher Nassetta
Hilton Hotels and Resorts
7930 Jones Branch Dr.
McLean VA  22102

Chris,

On Saturday November 17th, I had reserved two rooms in your Rockville MD property for one night via Expedia.  Though even a cursory glance at the hotel via online photographs revealed it to be far from the jewel of the Hilton crown, it seemed like a decent value for a functional one night’s sleep.  This particular hotel has the rooms built around the indoor courtyard in what seemed like daring design in the 1980s, but instead revealed itself to be a terrible layout that makes it seem like you are in the undercarriage of a steamship due to the complete lack of natural light.  I am not sure why someone thought it would be a good idea to have all the rooms of the hotel surrounding an indoor courtyard used for wedding receptions and other annoying events, but the 80s were a decade fueled by cocaine, synthesizers, and neon colored clothes.  It must have made sense at the time.

  Regardless, my three traveling companions and I arrived at about 1am eager to check in.  This is when the fiasco began.  The desk clerk was able to locate only one of my room reservations despite my showing him the Expedia confirmation with two separate rooms on my iphone. He looked at our confirmation, checked his system, but could only find one despite the irrefutable evidence I had of having two.  I was immediately concerned about not having our required rooms and having to find alternate accommodations at such a late hour, but upon asking I learned that the hotel indeed had many available rooms that evening, and at a lower rate than promised by Expedia.  “Great!”, I said.  “Let’s just forget about the other reservation and start a new check-in for two rooms at your current rate!”.  This is when I discovered that your company had decided to do complete computer update and could not check anyone into the system.  “So, let me get this straight…  I have two reservations.  You have multiple rooms.  You just won’t give me the keys.  You are essentially closed.”

  The front desk had made the decision that as they could not log onto your system, they could not honor the reservation agreement.  Allow me to be frank.  I have a very low expectation of overnight front desk clerks.  I recognize that the labor pool available for this position is, shall we say, “flawed”.  However, this man’s lack of problem solving ability was startling even for my limited expectations.  “Sir, if you can offer me any suggestions…”  He was totally flummoxed, and “flummoxed” is a word I don’t have the opportunity to use very often.  I suggested A) checking us the room already in the system and then switching us into a suite that met our needs B) checking us into the existing reservation and then holding my credit card, van keys or whatever else deemed valuable enough to open up another of the available rooms so we could settle the financial particulars in the morning C) calling someone else in the company that was aware of the challenges of your system that could help him figure out a palatable solution.  He decided to go in another direction.

  “Sir… I could check you into the one room and then at 5am when the system upgrade is finished, someone could come down to check into the other room.”  I will admit, this caught me by surprise.  I paused for a moment to allow that to register.  I leaned in.  “So… just a couple guys talking here…  Let’s forget our job titles and all…  You want the four of us to cram into a room, sleep for a couple hours, and then two of us wake up, come downstairs with our luggage, and then stand here to check into another room?  You think that’s a good idea?  As in “the best option possible”?”  He looked at me and blinked with a strained look on his face.  We had surpassed the limits of his abilities for problem solving.

  Let me bring you up to speed with my traveling situation.  I am in a rock band that played a show in DC.  I am a “song and dance man”.  We make our living “on the boards”.  We are “show people”.  We know what we need and expect in our hotel situation.  Here's what I was now facing…  Our guitar player is with his wife.  He is as sick as a dog with some sort of sinus/lung infection that makes him sound like a chain smoking retired coal miner with black lung.  I don’t want to be anywhere near him as he spreads his infection in close quarters while snoring like an angry beast.  To my left is our bass player, known in certain circles as “Brown Dynamite” due to her limited ability to digest beans and various other legumes.  It should be noted that we played that evening at Hilltop Barbeque which provided us a meal complete with very tasty, yet no doubt, powerful, baked beans.  The last place I want to be is positioned next to Brown Dynamite while on the other side of me Hex is struggling for life, gurgling for breath.  That is not the restful situation I had contracted for my friend. 

  At this point in my delicate negotiations with your front desk man, the guitar player's wife gets on the phone to call one of your 800 numbers.  She’s a “Hilton Diamond Club Member”.  It did not sound like the phone call went well.  I overheard her say, “So you are telling me that as a Diamond Club member you cannot get me a room in your hotel with available rooms that I am currently standing in?”.  Between me and you, this “Diamond Club” doesn’t sound like a very ritzy club at all.  Can you imagine if she was only “Gold”?  They would have recommended she sleep in the lobby using a discarded newspaper as a blanket.  

  By this time, it is about 2:15am and I just gave up.  I took the only room the clerk would provide us at the inflated rate.  I would not describe the night’s stay in your Hilton Rockville Hotel and Executive Meeting Center with the same flowery language that is used in your promotional materials.  I slept about four hours until the insistent cleaning crew began tapping at our doors to get in and turn the room.  Perhaps it is a cultural misunderstanding that when I told the maid that we needed her to comeback "later", that meant she should resume tapping on the door in 12 minutes.  She must have assumed the four of us huddled up like shipwreck survivors in your standard size room would have been crisp and refreshed after the additional 12 minutes of time she provided. 

  Here's what I am thinking...  As I would describe our experience at the Hilton Rockville Hotel as "not what we signed up for", I am of the opinion you should at the very least refund the charges on the room.  Why in God's name did your company decide to effectively shut off your computer system and effectively close for business on a Saturday night?  Did some IT guy go rogue over there?  I did what I was supposed to do and Hilton made Hilton's problem my problem.  Very disappointing.  Do me a solid here.  Give me a refund.

  I look forward to hearing back from you.

 

  Best regards,

  Greg Miller

P.S.  If I get Hex’s illness and am sick over Thanksgiving, I am coming to your corporate headquarters and licking all your phones.