I just read Johnny Marr's autobiography. It was odd not to be reading a wine textbook, but I needed a break. If you aren't down with The Smiths, you obviously were not a 19 year old in the mid 1980s. Look, I know that Morrissey can be a bit much. When he was a 22 year old provocateur celibate (wink wink), he was much more interesting than the grumpy old LA queen he slowly morphed into. That Smiths catalogue is undeniably great, mostly for Johnny Marr's catchy riffs and inventive arrangements. When I got into them, there was almost no news or information about the band available in the American press. All I knew was I liked the songs, and if you were having dramatic relationship problems in a way only young adults can, a Smiths record was a great soundtrack.
I had tickets to see them in 1986 at Public Hall in Cleveland, and I couldn't go. My mother pulled some kind of power play to jam me up and wouldn't let me take the car. I was 19, in Columbus, and had $300 to my name, so I didn't have a lot of options. Even now I remember my mother digging in with the rationale "I might need to use the car" smug with the leverage she had and both of us knowing she wasn't driving anywhere. Honestly, even now I'm pissed about the incident. I missed the show, ate the ticket cost, and the Smiths broke up a few weeks later. I never saw The Smiths. I still have the ticket I think.
I read the Marr book hoping to get any insight into what made that band work. Band politics are hard to describe to someone that has never been in a band. It's like having three girlfriends at once, and at any given time, one of them might be pissed at you. It's tough if you are in a local band. I can't imagine what is was like if you were those guys. Their rise to fame is unthinkable now. They wrote some songs. Someone knew someone else, and they drove over to a record label to hand deliver a tape of their first recording. The little indie label quickly pressed it. They played a show at the soon to be famous Hacienda club. 12 people came out. Someone at the BBC, undoubtedly a connection of the small label owner, played the record on one of the nation's four stations. A couple weeks later because the record had response they go on Top Of The Pops to lip sync their record. They had a gig the same night at Hacienda, and after that day's TV appearance a thousand people lined up outside to see them. Bam. Famous. That's a different age...
We live in such a fractured media landscape now that people don't even live in the same reality anymore. I've got a neighbor living in fear of MS-13 street gang members despite the fact that the most Central American thing in this community is the Taco Bell by City Hall. I work with some women that were very excited about developments on some reality TV show and I'd never heard of the show much less the character they were debating about. They looked at me like I was some hopelessly out of touch dork and I'm thinking the same thing about them because they didn't know what the Beachland was. I don't know if life was better when one TV appearance made you famous for your entire life, but those days are over. The TV station where I work has a bunch of news reporters that I couldn't name if my life depended on it, and a couple decades ago they would have been bona fide local celebs. It's a different age.
By the way, I still don't understand why the Smiths broke up. Marr spends the book talking about how he was the guy that was tasked with writing the music and handling the nuts and bolts of band life. Then suddenly he says a lawyer shows up and claims to be the band's lawyer and he didn't know anything about it, which seem sort of strange since you're the main guy and people can't just show up and tell you "I'm your lawyer now". That whole portion of the book goes like this. "I had to handle everything which was fine because I was the only one that knew what to do. I was writing our new album and focused on that and then this guy claims to be our lawyer shows up with documents and I just signed them without really reading them and then I got 40% of the money and Morrissey got 40% and the two other guys were pissed. We left the little label that made us famous and went to a major label and then the little label called pissed off because no one told them we were leaving. I was like "I'm as surprised as you are" and then we went on this tour that went great and I read in the paper when I got home that I had left the band. The band broke up and I was like, what happened?". Clear as mud. Now I'll have to trudge through Morrissey's book. Dammit.
I'll tell you this. When I read that Morrissey book I will do so with the NFL games on. The weather is going to be shitty and it's a perfect scenario to read a snotty mopey Brit settle some old scores while I watch the Raiders get their dicks pounded into the dirt yet again. I have some concerns about how the favorites have been routinely covering games this year. The sports books tend to have their Redemption Weeks and they are a savage comeuppance. I don't want to stare with an uncomprehending gaze as Gardinar Minshew tosses a meaningless TD to some backup tight end to sneak inside the spread. However, I cannot and will not bet with the Raiders. That team is such a shit show and Antonio Pierce is coaching with the erratic style of a Dead Man Walking. He should have never been a head coach in the first place and he knows these are his last weeks striding around with that mantle. I think Sean Payton knows that for the Broncos to make the playoffs, they need to win all the games they are "supposed to" win. I know I am buying high on the Broncos, but I'll bet against the late season Raiders when given the chance. That line is BEGGING to be teased down, which concerns me... Denver -6
Here's a quick handicap for you. I don't think Seattle is any good. I think Arizona is the best team in the NFC West. I am going to take the better team. Arizona -1. People still think that Seattle has this tremendous home field advantage. That died with the Legion of Boom fading into the memory banks. Geno is 3-10 ATS in his last 13 starts. How's that? Arizona -1.
In the spirit of the upcoming Galaxy of Wagers on Thanksgiving, let's make a nice underdog teaser. Generally what I am looking for is low variance opponents with a good defense on the underdog side to allow the team to hang around in the fourth quarter. Minnesota is 8-2, keeps winning, but Sam Darnold has very quietly returned to being the pedestrian QB he's been since he came into the league. The Bears have a good defense, and have employed a quick pass/high efficiency plan to try and get Caleb Williams to at least sort of look like a franchise QB. Every talking head I have seen likes Minnesota this week. Give me the Bears. New England won't win in Miami this week because they almost never do. The Dolphins like to roast the opponent in the sun while they stand around on the shade side of the stadium. 77 and sunny this Sunday according to Accuweather Megacast. New England has been playing hard. They're just not very good. I am looking at Miami money line and New England with the points. Chicago +10/New England +13.5.
Current record: 19-19
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