Altamont and NFL Week 4

 

There must have been something with the moon or Mercury was in a phase.  There was a weird edge to the scene at the gig in New Philly last night.  I'm not someone that goes in for that "phases of the moon" shit to explain away behavior, but maybe there's something to it.  You know how sometimes if you walk into a room and it just feels like something minor could set it off?  It must be the animal instincts we still hold within us.  Having played gigs in clubs for too long, I can usually tell if that guy is someone you need to keep an eye on, the junkyard dog of the pack.  This was different.  It was more of a "keep an eye on those guys" vibe.  

We played a couple of sets, and the crowd wasn't particularly engaged with the first one.  We played a lot of new material that isn't in the Muscle Memory Zone yet, more in the "I think it goes like that" tentative phase.  That didn't help.  It also didn't help that the sound guy was breaking in new gear and our on stage sound would vary wildly between a throbbing hum just short of a painful whistle and dropping out completely.  Think of it as having to give a Best Man's speech while someone right next to you kept fucking around with the TV on as loud as it could possibly get.  I thought we played OK, but who knows what it sounded like out there.

Anyway, we play a second set and we're clicked in pretty well.  There's more back and forth with The People.  We are getting down to the bottom part of the setlist, and in the middle of a song I see a commotion.  Some guy is shoving another guy and then his friends shove that guy so some other guys start grabbing them.  It's this ballooning mass of dudes being shoved towards the stage.  Then, out of nowhere from my left, I see this woman crack a bottle over one of these dude's heads.  Glass and foam spray everywhere.  It's like she just decided to jump into it though it didn't look like she had a dog in the fight.  Some would have been concerned that things had gone completely out of control.  I was not.

What immediately popped into my head was all the stage dialogue from the Rolling Stones Altamont disaster.  In a sense, I had prepared my entire life to make this one joke.  Now granted, I knew that only a small portion of people standing there would get this joke, but to them it would be VERY funny.  To me it would be VERY VERY funny.  Frankly, this is the entire reason to be in a niche rock band.  These brief moments are the reward for all the toil.  Telling myself jokes as the junkyard dog guys fought each other is perhaps the sweetest treat of all.

Brothers and sisters...  Who's fighting and what for?  Who's fighting and what for?  Brothers and sisters...  Why are we fighting?  Why are we fighting?  (At this point I switched to do the Richards part).  If that cat RIGHT THERE don't stop it man, we ain't playing.

If you somehow have never watched the "Gimme Shelter" documentary on the Rolling Stones 1969 tour, I cannot recommend it any more highly.  It is absolutely compulsory viewing.  Looking at how genuinely half assed enormous rock shows were being put on, the doe eyed attitudes of people in the scene, and the America that is so far gone yet so familiar makes it riveting.  The Altamont scenes alone are stunning.  I'm always surprised when I meet someone that's into music/counterculture that hasn't digested the film.  That being said, I will note that at this point Sugar was wondering why I suddenly was speaking with a bad British accent.  I also assume that most of the people standing there had no idea why I was saying any of these things as this brawl ensued, but I will say that for myself and the three other people I saw genuinely laughing hard, it was all worth it.  

Sometimes you have to take a path that looks a little rocky.  That's what I'm going to do today when I jump on the Cincinnati Bengals -4.  Look, an 0-3 team that looks like absolute shit yet is somehow favored on the road seems like a terrible idea to get behind.  I get it.  The Bengals defense is eye wateringly awful, unable to even put up loose resistance to the Washington Commanders.  That is what savvy NFL viewers would call "troubling".  Yet, this was a team that was supposed to win 10 games.  They aren't going 0-17.  They have to win at some point.  Why not against a Carolina team that won their first game last week since The Great Depression?  Let's be honest with ourselves.  The end of The Bryce Young era to embark on The Andy Dalton Era is not going to dramatically change the Panthers fortunes.  While Dalton is a professional football player as opposed to Bryce Young who looked like a high school kid tasked to compete with men, he's still Andy Dalton.   Andy Dalton is an amazing choice for a team that wants to take the ball from their 20 to the other team's 20 and then somehow not score any points.  I think the Bengals win what is sure to be a shitty game.  

Most of the games today are a wilderness of mirrors.  I'm not sure why almost all the key players in the league are already hurt.  It could be that football is insanely dangerous.  Maybe that's it.  Normally I'd be all over the Rams vs the Bears as it appears the City of Chicago has come to realize they took the wrong guy at #1.  However, EVERYONE on the Rams is hurt.  Can Miami beat that piece of shit Tennessee team with a guy they signed off the street to play QB?  I can't go the other way on that.  I'm sure as shit not putting money on any team that Will Levis is involved in.  You want to take SF to cover 10.5 with "some guy" playing WR and "some other guy" playing TE?  I'm not.  How about Jordan Love gimping out onto the field to play the Vikings?  Seems like Justin Herbert is going to try to play with his fucked up feet.  I have no clue if those guys can move.  The injuries make this impossible to handicap.  Yet, I'm oddly compelled to bet this Browns v Raiders game despite the fact that anyone a casual fan has ever heard of is injured.

The key to that game is Deshaun Watson IS NOT injured and WILL NOT be injured after he noted that he has no intention of running the ball, and plans on limiting any contact while he's on the field.  That's bad news to Browns fans as he cannot complete passes longer than 10 yards and also seems to be completely indifferent to that reality.  I am not blind to the fact that the Raiders are terrible, have their best two players on the injury list, and are imploding after their largely incompetent head coach called the team out after last week's loss.  The Browns cannot be counted on to cover a spread versus anyone, much less on the road.  You know that you're QB is killing you when the first thought when looking at the game is "Minshew is the better player".  I'm on the Raiders +2.5.    

I know Jacksonville +5.5 is probably the best side, but I just can't do it.  I work too hard for my money to get Doug Pederson involved in my finances.  The same thing with the Colts with the points.  Richardson is the Russell Branyon of NFL players.  One long home run and 57 consecutive strike outs.  Seattle +3.5 seems reasonable too.  Bills v Ravens?  Fuck if I know.  I'm just not feeling any of these other games at this point.  Time to live to fight another day.

Current record:  4-5