Sunday, January 18, 2015

Nurse the Hate: NFL Conference Championships

Allow me to be perfectly frank.  I have no idea what is about to transpire in either of these NFL Playoff games.  Sometimes I really feel like the future is a certainty, and while maybe a few small details have yet to reveal themselves, the outcome is pre-determined.  For example, I know The Will of The Gods will never allow a Cleveland team to win a championship, or maybe even a game of consequence in my lifetime.  I know that when you are at your job and a new compensation plan is revealed with the statement “This is going to be good for you”, it never is…  When you ask a woman what is wrong, and she says, “I don’t know” you can be certain she knows EXACTLY what is bothering her.  There is a sense in those situations of being a master at a chessboard, being able to see several moves ahead.  This is not one of those situations.

This Green Bay/Seattle game is all smoke and mirrors.  Aaron Rodgers looked like absolute shit in the first half of the game last week.  God knows what kind of wonder juice they shot into his leg to allow him to scamper around like a playful deer in the second half.  Does that mean that this week the Packers training staff has enough wonder juice to get him through the whole game?  How much of this information on his injury is actually misinformation?  It makes my head want to explode.

Seattle never loses at home.  Well, they lost to Dallas at home.  But let’s forget about that.  Let’s focus in on those smug salmon eating fucks dressed in their ugly Seahawk gear feeling good about themselves because of how loud that stadium gets in the constant downpours and doom laden clouds.  That and the whole “the Seahawks are back and will never lose again” rhetoric has pushed the line up to Green Bay +8.  Eight!  The Aaron Rodgers led Packers have NEVER been an eight point dog.  Ever!  It seems impossible that Seattle can cover eight.  It cannot happen.

That is exactly why I am taking Seattle -8 (God help me).  I am going to hope that Green Bay being 1-10-1 as underdogs against the spread continues.  The Seahawks are 25-2 at home in their last 27.  I have to think that Vegas giving Green Bay 8 is only a way to get every Rube on the planet on the wrong side.  Seattle -8

This late game is considered to be just a road bump for the Evil Empire of New England before their glitzy showdown with whoever wins the NFC.  My gut says that both home teams will win today, which of course means the home teams will split the games.  In theory I should go for the “feast or famine” concept and take Indy with the points to be on either the right or wrong side of a home/away winner split.  I just can’t see Indianapolis winning two playoffs games in a row on the road.  They have sucked on the road forever, and beating an old gimpy Peyton Manning doesn’t change that overnight.  Sonofabith.  I’m taking the other home team and guaranteeing giving away the juice.  New England -6.


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