Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Nurse the Hate: Hate Betsy DeVos

It’s an exciting age we live in when a woman that would probably be going for her real estate license to “keep her busy” instead gets to be in charge of the Department of Education because she is a billionaire political donor.  Betsy DeVos is as qualified to be Secretary of Education as I am to be Chief Surgeon at Cleveland Clinic.  Frankly, I might be more qualified to be chief surgeon as I used to watch a lot of MASH episodes as a kid.  I know I can say things like “close him up” after walking away from the table.  I could also probably do that move where I take off my glasses and wipe them with a cloth when I tell a patient “It’s never easy to deliver news like this…  You don’t have much of a chance…  But there is a radical procedure we can try that just might save your life.”  I would generally say that with a furrowed brow as I look up from my glass cleaning activity and then place them back on my face while looking oddly confident for a man that has never gone to medical school.

It’s not just me that knows Betsy DeVos is unqualified.  Every single person in the Senate knew it too.  It’s like you woke her up at some luxury hotel on vacation and tossed her up in front of a Senate hearing to answer questions on a subject with which she had complete unfamiliarity.  Like how the American public education system works.  She would have had just as good of a chance effectively answering questions for heading up defense or energy.  She actually got to live that dream where you show up for an exam and you are completely unprepared.  I guess to have been exactly like that nightmare she would have been in her underwear.  She’s a billionaire.  I bet she has nice underwear.  High end for sure.  Dammit.  Now I’m thinking about Betsy DeVos's preferred pantie style.  I didn’t ask for this!  Damn you Trump.

Back to the point.  She is totally unqualified to run public education.  It’s not like this is my opinion.  It couldn’t have been more evident.  That Senate hearing was a hoot.  The bottom line is that almost every single one of those reprehensible worms in the Senate is more concerned with keeping their mouth in the trough in Washington instead of serving any of the people that voted for them.  They could have found someone else after having some unpleasantness or just vote her in.  They then met expectations and voted in a complete incompetent.  If they had been given the task of voting in a mallard duck for that position, they would have done so.  “Well, though the duck has limited experience in running public schools, I would like to point out that this particular mallard duck is very enthusiastic and will make an excellent Secretary.  The duck is Christian too!”   Quack.

Please note that I do not think the Democrats are wonderful for voting against her either as I firmly believe that the only reason they opposed her was that they couldn’t figure out how to rubber stamp her through without giving at least the appearance of caring about the people they represent.  They were only howling in protest because they thought maybe they could get a win for "their team" with this unlikely cabinet appointee.  The Democrats don't really care about public education.  The only thing any of these people care about is maintaining their lives in Washington DC.  It must be an awesome lifestyle.  Ozzy Osbourne didn't try that hard to stay a rock star, and he got to do literally anything he wanted.  Imagine how great it must be to have one of those Senate gigs.  They will do absolutely anything to stay.  Anyone that gets in to Congress immediately loses their ethical compass and ends up like that spineless twerp Mitch McConnell.  Interviewer:  “Senator McConnell, President Trump referred to a federal judge as “so-called”, compared the United States with Russia on human rights violations and once again oddly complimented Putin while refusing to divulge his finances. What do you think?”  McConnell:  “I’m not going to get into that.  Excuse me I am late for my wife’s appointment to become Secretary of Transportation.”

I really screwed up.  I never should have done this rock band thing.  I should have become more “electable”.  Maybe I could have been charming and given the appearance of wanting to serve my community.  True, getting in would have been tough if anyone even made a cursory glance at my background.  The election would have been especially difficult for me as the bad decisions of my youth and subsequent years would have been almost impossible to explain away.  I've done things that are tough to explain in context, much less the things that could be dredged up out of context.  You never know though.  Trump was out there grabbin' pussy and he won.  I might have been one Kellyanne Conway away from living the dream and making it impossible for your kids to get the critical thinking necessary to have never voted for me in the first place.  

God Bless America.  


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