Monday, July 21, 2008

Nurse the Hate: Hate The Pickle

I found myself in a bit of a pickle last week. I should have learned my lesson in 2004 when the New York Yankees went up 3-0 over the Red Sox in the American League Championship Series. No team has ever come back froma 3-0 deficit. You could not avoid this piece of information being hammered out of every broadcast on every station on my cable network. I think even Rachel Ray mentioned it on 30 Minute Meals.

I bet strong on the Yankees to close it out. I lost. I doubled down. I lost. At the end of the four game carnage, I wrote a giant check to my people in Antigua and walked around town in a barrel. I still get pissed off when I see footage of that creep Curt Schilling whooping it up, and Manny "being Manny" with his freaky braids smiling like a Chesire Cat.

Let's fast forward to 2008. I found myself placing a little bet on the Tampa Bay Rays last week when they came to town to play the dead end Indians. I figured, the Rays just got swept by the Yankees. They do have the best record in baseball though. Surely they'll right the ship here. The Tribe is unable to score more than 2 runs per game, and with Jeremy "Zippo" Sowers on the bump, it's an easy win for me. Worse case scenario, I'll just double up tomorrow.

To refresh your memory, the Tribe somehow swept the Rays and I was out a pile of jack at the All Star break. I was committed to my "Double Down" plan though, and came out swinging after the All Star Break. It was with great joy that I saw crappy little utility infielder Ben Zobrist go deep in the seventh inning off AJ Burnett to put the Rays up 2-1 against a run of the mill Blue Jay squad. I enjoy a nice wager like most red blooded American men, and most heavy smoking Asian tourists. But I have to say, having $300 on a meaningless Rays v Blue Jays game is no civilized way to spend a Friday night.

Here's one good thing that came out of this sordid little affair. Ben Zobrist, my new favorite baseball player, will never have to buy a beer in Cleveland.


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