Nurse the Hate: Hate The Fat Kids
I have great concern for the people of Asia. The Little Korean Fat Kid has created a very
risky and complicated situation at perhaps the worst time in history. The Little Fat Kid thinks he can shove his
way into being a nuclear superpower.
This would allow the Little Fat Kid to sit at The Big Boy’s Table and
have a larger voice in world events. The
rest of the world, being sensible, thinks this is a terrible idea as the Little
Fat Kid is crazy along the same lines as a James Bond villain. It’s remarkable he doesn’t walk around
stroking a white cat. I think we can
safely say that the whole planet likes action movies, Coca Cola, and the Little
Fat Kid not to have nuclear missiles.
We’re all on board with that.
The problem is we have our own Little Fat Kid here in Trump that
is going to completely fuck this up. Our
Little Fat Kid is “unpredictable” according to all press accounts. This is actually an unfair assessment. If you want to know what our Little Fat Kid
is going to do, all that is required is to do is ask yourself “what is the
biggest dick move you could possibly make?”.
Kids born in the US to illegal immigrants that have never even been to
their parent’s country of origin? Deport
them there! Get elected on the strength
of the white poor working class? Cut
their medical coverage to give yourself a tax cut! Korean Fat Kid starts with the shit
talk? Inflame the situation by taking up
the shit talk a notch via Twitter!
The entire Trump cabinet is now filled with generals. Generals are like surgeons. If you have ever been to a surgeon’s office,
his/her diagnosis is always the same.
“We’d better get surgery scheduled!”
If you sit in a room filled with military people, their diagnosis is
“let’s blow some shit up over there!”.
Yet, in this case when our Little Fat Kid started up the shit talk of
fire and brimstone, they quickly went to the “Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa!” card. This is because they
realize that 30 million people in Seoul are in big trouble if we start shooting
gigantic guns. This is also because they
have what is considered to be a normal amount of human empathy.
This is where things get dicey. Neither the Little Korean Fat Kid or Our Fat
Kid appears to have even a shred of empathy.
The Little Korean Fat Kid killed his extended family with antiaircraft
guns and fed some of them to wild animals.
This does not suggest someone that is overly concerned about “people” in
general. He makes Our Fat Kid seem like
Mother Teresa by comparison. Yet just
because you have more character than the absolute lowest of the low doesn’t
mean you have good character. Let’s
remember, our Fat Kid made personnel change announcements during Hurricane
Harvey because “ratings would be up”.
Ugh.
So the situation is we have two assholes with nuclear
weapons that only care about themselves.
This is what historians call “bad”. This is also not what I signed up for, and I
would like to suggest to the other X billion people on the planet that we get
these two people out of their positions of power quickly before we all get
killed. I understand many areas are nice
on the Asian peninsula, probably much more so without radiation and mushroom
clouds. I would imagine the next few
years would be much more pleasurable for the majority of us if we are all not
busy trying to set each other on fire. I
have a few things I would like to get done, and setting people on fire was not
one of my top priorities.
So as the United States is preparing to get pounded by yet
another hurricane, we need to hope someone in the seemingly out of control
White House can juggle two natural disasters, the Little Korean Fat Kid, and
all the other normal bullshit. Is anyone with intellect driving this bus? The one
solace I suppose I have as an American citizen is though the planet will likely
be destroyed, I will receive a tax cut. I
hope I can spend that money on a hot tub before the radiation sickness gets me.
4 Comments:
Have you enjoyed this years Troegs hop knife harvest ale? Damn good beer.
Good to watch CNN Asia to I will betcha!
30 Seconds To The Decline Of Planet Earth came out on vinyl.
Garrett had a high ankle sprain.
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