Happy Days and NFL Week 9

 

Thank God this election is over.  If you lived in one of these competitive race states, which apparently became most of them thanks to the majority of people being surprised that the fascist guys did exactly what they said they were going to do and did fascist shit, then you were absolutely pummeled by attack ads.  From what I was able to takeaway, my choices for governor were between a stock scamming carpet bagger that wanted to put a data center in my backyard OR a lying alcoholic woman prone to crying fits in public spaces.  Then I had to figure out for Senate if I wanted the backdealing First Energy empty suit that doesn't want me to be able to go to the doctor OR the guy that chopped off the breasts off some woman from Texas that he somehow coerced into a sex change operation.  I'd be at home trying to do the laundry and someone would pop out of my hamper saying things like "Do you think it's a good idea to give eight year olds heroin?  Amy Action does!".  I had Republican attacks ads that had somehow been programmed to play on my refrigerator.  It's been a long 3-4 months where the firehose of bullshit never shut off.

I will be honest and say that if Max Miller or Vivek Ramaswamy had won, that might have been the last straw for continuing to view the people in Ohio as anything less than monsters.  There are politicians I don't agree with like if some guy is peddling the "trickle down economics" theory or wants to mess around with educational standards, but those are differences of ideas that can be debated.  Max and Vivek are just two really shitty human beings that have no moral bottom and have somehow never learned how to differentiate between the standards of right/wrong.  I certainly know more than my share of people that pulled that move of "Well, I don't like the things Trump says, but I agree with many of his policies", and I had my concern that those types of people also lacked a bottom floor of basic decency.  Thank God I was wrong about that.  Well, this time at least.

It seems like after the initial shock of being so soundly rebuked by the American people fades, the various evil clowns running the executive branch will come up with counterproductive distractions that won't help anyone but their egos.  I hope that the next 6 months are spent systematically looking at the various cash grabs all these grifters went for assuming that they'd never face any blowback.  So much of OUR MONEY got stolen by these opportunistic thieves it will take an army of accountants and lawyers to try to find it all.  I hope that no one forgets all the people in Congress that just sat on their hands and did absolutely nothing while this feeding frenzy went on.  I'm not talking exclusively one party here, though I think it will be especially interesting to see all those silent Republicans trying to distance themselves like 1946 Germans from National Socialism.  "I was only following orders" is the time honored technique for those not well read on that topic.  I'd guess they will try to pretend they never knew Trump and when old social media posts of them screaming to execute protestors in the streets or cheering on that historical blunder in Iran do surface, they will say "I have a staff that writes that.  I don't even know how to use a phone.".  I hope people will remember how quickly those representatives sold out their communities just to stay behind the velvet rope.  I think it should be considered proper etiquette to yell out "SHAME!" and clang on a bell anytime Kristi Noem or Pam Bondi is seen in public, but maybe I'm just old fashioned that way.

My guess is that we will have just a brief pause before a steady sewage flow pipe of total bullshit washes down on all of us from a phone in the grill room of Mar-A-Lago and on sundowning jags from DC.  We have so many serious problems that require serious people, and it's like the country used a hammer on its feet for two years straight.  I'm glad that there are some well intentioned people that have a background not based on fringe cable TV talk shows that will tackle some of these issues.  Regardless even if a small glimmer of hope has shown itself, we should not lose the point of the real victory last Tuesday.  I'm, of course, referring to the cessation of political ads to switch back to Liberty Bibberty ads.  I like to be comfortable when I'm watching the Bucs get smoked by the Bears on a Sunday. 

I am abandoning my policy of not betting on NFC South games when I realized the potential that existed of betting AGAINST the NFC South.  I think the Bears acquisition of Jeffrey Simmons is a big deal for that defense.  Simmons is a friggen monster, and it became evident after only one week how much the attention he garners is going to benefit Sweat.  I think the Bears are the best team in the NFC right now, but we will see if that holds based on how the 49ers health goes.  The Bucs have had two really weird games where Mayfield has been playing with a totally fucked up thumb, but hasn't had to throw the ball.  That's not going to work this week, because the Bears are going to score points.  Mayfield will have to throw, and if he's running for his life with a fucked up thumb, he's going to toss a couple picks.  The Bears at home can cover the nut on the Bucs.  Chicago -6.

I bet the Jets earlier in the week, and now I have great concern about that position.  I listen to degenerate football gambling podcasts when I walk the dogs in the morning.  I swear to fucking Christ every single show I listened to was saying "ten is too many points for KC to be giving the Jets".  I mean, I'm not kidding.  The guys I think are sharp are on the Jets.  The guys that are always chalky as shit are on the Jets.  That position has so much goddamn steam that the +10 I got early in the week has been bet down to +8.5.  Whenever I see this many people running towards the light, I tend to assume it is an oncoming freight train as opposed to the glory of Nirvana.  I am VERY concerned about my position here, but here I am sitting Jets+10.   I also have the jets tied into the second half of a teaser with the winning Jacksonville leg at Jets +16.  Shiver me timbers.

I am not really sure what is going on with the Browns QB situation.  Watson is in the concussion protocol.  Sanders is starting.  Watson is out of the concussion protocol and at practice.  Sanders is still allegedly starting.  I am moving ahead with the assumption that it's Sanders.  Who the hell knows?  I didn't like the Browns spot here regardless.  This will be the Browns third road game in a row.  The Saints are coming off of a bye.  It's not like Watson is great as the Browns are towards the bottom of NFL offensive production, but he's better than Sanders.  The Browns are an illusionary 5-3.  This is exactly the kind of game that teams that are sorta shitty lose.  With the Saints being 0-3 at home, they gotta win at home sooner or later.  Now seems like as good a time as any.  New Orleans -3   

I am going to bet a couple games in the second half.  I won on TH night betting against future trivia question Joe Fagnano who made his likely only NFL start last week being totally ineffective against the Jaguars.  We did get a lot of shots of his cute wife as Joe sucked as bad as one would expect a guy making his NFL debut versus the Jags.  I don't know if Joe Milton of the Eagles has a cute wife, but there's a pretty good chance that if he does we might see her.  I did a deep dive and found that when a backup QB is making his first ever NFL start, the game tends to break about 50-50 ATS.  However, if you look at the second half, the coverage rate goes down to 40%.  I am not exactly eager to run in and bet JJ McCarthy and the Giants as a road favorite, but it is blatantly obvious the Eagles season is o-v-e-r and the players know it.  Usually these backup QBs come in and have a benefit of doing a couple things the defense wasn't ready for, and then quick adjustments are made and they shut that shit down.  I'm going to see what's doing and unless things seem sketchy, I'm going New York Giants second half.  

 I made the comment this week that Gardiner Minshew is like that frog in the lunchbox in that old Loony Toons cartoon.  You know the one I mean?  It's the one where the frog will sing "Michigan Rag" when you don't need him to, but then you rent out the theater and sell it full, and he's a goddamn frog.  Arizona got so caught up in Minshew Mania that they dealt Brissett and committed to Minshew for the rest of the year.  They still think they have the dancing frog.  They don't know yet.  They just don't know...  The belief that Drew Locke isn't a downgrade from Darnold seems iffy to me, but Darnold has sorta sucked since he came back from injury.  I just need the Seattle defense to show up and stop the Frog.  I am going to tie them up with the Packers on the road in New England.  I have no idea who is going to win that Packers v Patriots game, but I do know that Green Bay hasn't lost a road game by more than 9 since Lafleur became coach.  Green Bay +9.5/Seattle -2.5 

Current Record:  13-14